an important milestone in the journey toward marriage
In both the houses, early in the morning, the house should be decorated with rangoli at the entrance, and torans at the doors. After taking bath, the ghar-ni ses should be kept ready and a divo lighted, either with ghee or coconut oil. They should also keep ready the following:
In both the houses, the ses and trays to be taken to the other side, should be kept ready early in the morning.
A table should be kept ready for keeping the things that will be brought by the girl's side.
The gharni sés with divo should be kept ready on a table.
Now the boy's mother should bring the girl home, taking back the sés she had taken with her, the Dahi Machli tray, the curd bowl, all the coconuts, all the garlands, all the envelopes given to them and the sasu-no-vago.
On reaching home, the boy's mother should give the ses in her hands, to someone else to hold, then enter the house, and with achumichu that was kept ready earlier, she should vadhavo the girl and the sés and then take the girl in the house, with her right foot first.
(Note: Another achumichu should be kept ready, because the girl's party will soon be coming)
Soon after the boy's party leaves, the girl's mother together with 4 or 6 sahovasans or kunvaris should go to the boy's house, taking with them all the sés that have been kept ready.
When the girl's party arrives, the boy's mother, who will be ready with achumichu, should do vadhavo. After meeting everyone, the girl's mother should request the boy to come on the patla with his right foot first. Then she should give him cash for the engagement, cash for the engagement vago and cash for Dahi Machli. After this the girl's mother should put a silver ring on the boy's left finger. He should then be given a coconut, a garland, a bouquet, a pan, a sopari, and some rice. Then he should be given sweetened curds to eat, and a little water to drink.
After this, the girl should be requested to stand on the same patla. Then the boy should first put the engagement ring on the left hand finger of the girl, and then the girl should put the engagement ring on the left hand finger of the boy. Then everyone should vadhavo them and bless them together.
Then the girl's mother should give to the boy's mother the saakar tapka tray, and the dahi Machli khumchi. After this she should put a silver rupee in the divo. Once this is over, the boy's side should give snacks to the girl's party.
Now the boy's mother should request the girl's mother to come on the patla and should give her an envelope of cash and also a garland. Then she should give envelopes of cash, and garlands to all the guests starting with the eldest.
The girl's party, before leaving, should invite the boy for dinner at night. Then, keeping in their sés the envelopes of cash given to them, coconuts and garlands, they should come home. They should leave behind in the boy's house, the tray and the khumchi they had brought. The girl should stay back.
When the boy's party arrives at the girl's house, the girl's mother should welcome them with achumichu as follows:
After this welcome, the boy's mother should enter the house with her right foot first, and then putting the ses in her hands on the table, she should embrace the girl's mother and others and talk with them for a while.
Now the girl should be requested to stand on the patla, which is decorated with 5 chok. She should step on the patla from behind, putting her right foot first.
(Note: The engagement ring should be left in the sés)
After this ceremony is over, the girl's side should serve snacks to the guests.
The girl's side should serve snacks to the guests and then the girl's mother should request the boy's mother to stand on the patla, and she should be given sasu dakhal-na clothes i.e. a saree, a blouse, and a petticoat. (The last two should be of the girl's size because later in the day, the whole set will be given to the girl, and she will be wearing these clothes).
Then, all those who have come from the boy's side starting with the eldest should be asked to stand on the patla and should be given envelopes and also coconuts and garlands.
After this is over, sprinkling some plain water or rose water on the patla, it should be removed.
Lastly, from the machli tray, the girl's mother should keep aside one fish, and keep some cash in the sés. With this, all the ceremonies in the girl's house, get over.
While sending the girl home at night, the boy's mother should give her the sasu-dakhal clothes which were given to her from the girl's side earlier. The girl should wear these clothes while going home. In a small sés, should be put a box of sweets and the girl's engagement clothes (as she would have changed her clothes now).
(Note: The boy should bring back the sés when he comes back at night though sending the sés is not necessary.)
When the boy and the girl go to the girl's house for dinner, the girl's mother should welcome them with achumichu. After dinner, when the boy goes home, the girl's mother should give him a gold coin or cash - ghar tedya-na. Also, to whatever cash that has come from the boy's side, something should be added (to make it an odd number) and given to the boy together with a garland, a bouquet, and a box of sweets.
(Note: If the girl has brought a sés from the boy's house, it should be sent back with the boy. Money given to the girl, is hers. It is not to be returned.)